Quotes of the day .... - Page 15

**Monstro** · 04 Dec 2008, 20:55

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Flying Mouse

Again, from e bay.......

While checking the feedback for a seller who sells wedding dresses

Isn't it customary for the groom to wear a suit?

**The Flying Mouse** · 04 Dec 2008, 21:21

As long as it's green

**The Flying Mouse** · 04 Dec 2008, 21:24

HELL YEAH

JanT · 05 Dec 2008, 11:15

"A good workman never blames his tools, and boy have I worked with some tools"

SamCat · 05 Dec 2008, 21:37

A van drove past today for a wine and spirits company called Planets of the Grapes!!

Betty · 18 Dec 2008, 14:28

At the christmas do last night, my boss to another boss in reply to the question if there was some "special" relationship between me and my boss:

"She´s always against me, I always fight that and she´s always right!!"

Wise man

Caelan · 18 Dec 2008, 17:37

"Everytime a woman has breast reduction surgery...an angel loses it's wings.

Craig Ferguson.. late late show CBS..

snowy · 18 Dec 2008, 22:09

From a pupil today......

'You don't look like a Meat Loaf fan - you're too respectable'

Little does he know!

**RadioMaster** · 18 Dec 2008, 22:14

about Meat Loaf fans or about you being respectable?

snowy · 18 Dec 2008, 22:18

Respectable - me?

**The Flying Mouse** · 18 Feb 2009, 08:11

My nephew came out with one that had my dad a bit speechless before

He was in the living room, and Trigger Happy TV was on the telly.
They did a sketch where they set this loud fanfare up for the millionth customer outside a sex shop.
Gag being that someone will try and make a quiet exit but will have a lot of noise and attention.Very embarasing, yadda yadda yadda.

Anyway, so Conor (8 years old) pipes up with question "What's a sex shop Grandad?"

While my dad's lost for words (and THAT'S a first) Conor follows up with his second question "is that where you go to buy sex?"

Battybarb · 18 Feb 2009, 09:52

i would love to have seen your dads face..lol

**The Flying Mouse** · 20 Feb 2009, 22:57

Jo - "Wait till tomorrow, i'll get you back you ~~~~~~"

Battybarb · 21 Feb 2009, 10:32

now now children.......

mszee · 21 Feb 2009, 19:03

Dan: Do you know somebody by the name of Mark Alexander? He requested to be my friend on Facebook...must be somebody from UK forum...

Battybarb · 22 Feb 2009, 11:21

thats great Zina...lol

mszee · 22 Feb 2009, 16:41

Quote:

Originally Posted by Battybarb

thats great Zina...lol

I am still waiting for...is Meat Loaf somebody from UK forum???

Hypnobabe · 06 May 2009, 20:02

From a client yesterday:

"Monkeys ate my guavas... It might have been the local boys, but I think it was monkeys..."

I hasten to add she was talking about the guavas on her guava tree at her house in Malawi...

samurai7 · 07 May 2009, 02:16

I got sent a text today containing a limerick that I SWEAR I wrote, years back. Of course, no-one believes me. How utterly frustrating.
PS I can't post it here, it's not, er, 'family-friendly'

LucyK! · 20 May 2009, 11:45

Patrick Swayze has denied his death...

Hypnobabe · 20 May 2009, 12:29

"You are a little woolly angel, Claire"

i'm assured it's a compliment....

duke knooby · 24 May 2009, 15:00

"There is so much music around now which is very well executed but it's soulless. It may be polished but it has no identity of its own".

DS jan 2005

duke knooby · 26 May 2009, 20:29

oui: That's easy to say now, but how did you feel about all that rejection a couple of years ago?

MEAT LOAF: I felt basically the same.I just thought everybody was crazy I still do. Because even though I've sold ten million records, they still don't know how good a songwriter Jim Steinman is. They don't know that Steinman is probably the greatest songwriter in the last twenty years. Maybe in the next hundred years-nobody will even come close to him. That's the God's truth.

duke knooby · 26 May 2009, 21:03

oui: Let's not be so modest. It's your singing, your delivery, that makes them special.

MEAT LOAF: Fine. That's great. But a singer is only as good as his band, an actor only as good as his script and the actors around him. You can't do anything by yourself Why is my name up there as top male singer in the Playboy poll, when Steinman isn't even listed with the writers? Where is that at? There isn't a writer on the list that can even come close to that man. What do you think we're dealing with here, Neil Diamond? This is Steinman - probably one of the greatest writers in this century. I'm not fooling. That goes for Dave Marsh, and whoever else thinks they're God in the rock-'n'-roll world-they're not. They're not; they're damn children. They're children. Excuse me, I'm mad.

MeatGrl1 · 30 May 2009, 03:43

Not really funny just bloody annoying... I had a bit of a sneezing fit at work and this customer asks.... "It's not swine flu is it?"

How rude !!!

Felt like saying, 'If it was and I had would I be working ?!"

But I didn't...

18 Dec 2008, 17:37	#357
Caelan life is one big adventure Join Date: 23.06.2005 Location: some town in Alberta called Leduc Posts: 5,550	"Everytime a woman has breast reduction surgery...an angel loses it's wings. Craig Ferguson.. late late show CBS.. Last edited by Caelan; 18 Dec 2008 at 17:46.

04 Dec 2008, 21:21	#352
The Flying Mouse Armed ba$tard and Jo's other half. Join Date: 06.08.2002 Location: In the middle of nowhere near the end of the line. Posts: 16,104	As long as it's green

04 Dec 2008, 21:24	#353
The Flying Mouse Armed ba$tard and Jo's other half. Join Date: 06.08.2002 Location: In the middle of nowhere near the end of the line. Posts: 16,104	HELL YEAH

05 Dec 2008, 11:15	#354
JanT Mega Loafer Join Date: 22.06.2006 Location: Blackpool Posts: 2,232	"A good workman never blames his tools, and boy have I worked with some tools"

05 Dec 2008, 21:37	#355
SamCat Hello Harry!!!! Join Date: 11.09.2006 Location: London Posts: 3,086	A van drove past today for a wine and spirits company called Planets of the Grapes!!

18 Dec 2008, 14:28	#356
Betty ˙·٠•● ♫ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♪ ●•٠·˙ Join Date: 12.11.2006 Location: Niedersachsen Posts: 6,387	At the christmas do last night, my boss to another boss in reply to the question if there was some "special" relationship between me and my boss: "She´s always against me, I always fight that and she´s always right!!" Wise man

18 Dec 2008, 22:09	#358
snowy Super Loafer Join Date: 21.04.2006 Location: Herts Posts: 292	From a pupil today...... 'You don't look like a Meat Loaf fan - you're too respectable' Little does he know!

18 Dec 2008, 22:14	#359
RadioMaster The German Join Date: 11.03.2006 Location: some kind of hunting lodge for rich weirdos... Posts: 15,778	about Meat Loaf fans or about you being respectable?

18 Dec 2008, 22:18	#360
snowy Super Loafer Join Date: 21.04.2006 Location: Herts Posts: 292	Respectable - me?

18 Feb 2009, 08:11	#361
The Flying Mouse Armed ba$tard and Jo's other half. Join Date: 06.08.2002 Location: In the middle of nowhere near the end of the line. Posts: 16,104	My nephew came out with one that had my dad a bit speechless before He was in the living room, and Trigger Happy TV was on the telly. They did a sketch where they set this loud fanfare up for the millionth customer outside a sex shop. Gag being that someone will try and make a quiet exit but will have a lot of noise and attention.Very embarasing, yadda yadda yadda. Anyway, so Conor (8 years old) pipes up with question "What's a sex shop Grandad?" While my dad's lost for words (and THAT'S a first) Conor follows up with his second question "is that where you go to buy sex?"

18 Feb 2009, 09:52	#362
Battybarb Nutty Tart From Hell Join Date: 25.05.2007 Location: liverpool Posts: 8,390	i would love to have seen your dads face..lol

20 Feb 2009, 22:57	#363
The Flying Mouse Armed ba$tard and Jo's other half. Join Date: 06.08.2002 Location: In the middle of nowhere near the end of the line. Posts: 16,104	Jo - "Wait till tomorrow, i'll get you back you ~~~~~~"

21 Feb 2009, 10:32	#364
Battybarb Nutty Tart From Hell Join Date: 25.05.2007 Location: liverpool Posts: 8,390	now now children.......

21 Feb 2009, 19:03	#365
mszee Mega Loafer Join Date: 28.03.2006 Location: And you think you're down under??? Posts: 26,252	Dan: Do you know somebody by the name of Mark Alexander? He requested to be my friend on Facebook...must be somebody from UK forum...

22 Feb 2009, 11:21	#366
Battybarb Nutty Tart From Hell Join Date: 25.05.2007 Location: liverpool Posts: 8,390	thats great Zina...lol

06 May 2009, 20:02	#368
Hypnobabe mszee's Mistress with sexy goddess boots Join Date: 13.07.2005 Location: Hitting the highway like a battering ram... Posts: 7,686	From a client yesterday: "Monkeys ate my guavas... It might have been the local boys, but I think it was monkeys..." I hasten to add she was talking about the guavas on her guava tree at her house in Malawi...

07 May 2009, 02:16	#369
samurai7 Rock Star Join Date: 09.05.2005 Location: The future... Posts: 2,928	I got sent a text today containing a limerick that I SWEAR I wrote, years back. Of course, no-one believes me. How utterly frustrating. PS I can't post it here, it's not, er, 'family-friendly'

20 May 2009, 11:45	#370
LucyK! The Monster Is Luce Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Posts: 7,547	Patrick Swayze has denied his death...

20 May 2009, 12:29	#371
Hypnobabe mszee's Mistress with sexy goddess boots Join Date: 13.07.2005 Location: Hitting the highway like a battering ram... Posts: 7,686	"You are a little woolly angel, Claire" i'm assured it's a compliment....

24 May 2009, 15:00	#372
duke knooby Mega Loafer Join Date: 24.06.2005 Location: belfast Posts: 17,911	"There is so much music around now which is very well executed but it's soulless. It may be polished but it has no identity of its own". DS jan 2005

26 May 2009, 20:29	#373
duke knooby Mega Loafer Join Date: 24.06.2005 Location: belfast Posts: 17,911	oui: That's easy to say now, but how did you feel about all that rejection a couple of years ago? MEAT LOAF: I felt basically the same.I just thought everybody was crazy I still do. Because even though I've sold ten million records, they still don't know how good a songwriter Jim Steinman is. They don't know that Steinman is probably the greatest songwriter in the last twenty years. Maybe in the next hundred years-nobody will even come close to him. That's the God's truth.

26 May 2009, 21:03	#374
duke knooby Mega Loafer Join Date: 24.06.2005 Location: belfast Posts: 17,911	oui: Let's not be so modest. It's your singing, your delivery, that makes them special. MEAT LOAF: Fine. That's great. But a singer is only as good as his band, an actor only as good as his script and the actors around him. You can't do anything by yourself Why is my name up there as top male singer in the Playboy poll, when Steinman isn't even listed with the writers? Where is that at? There isn't a writer on the list that can even come close to that man. What do you think we're dealing with here, Neil Diamond? This is Steinman - probably one of the greatest writers in this century. I'm not fooling. That goes for Dave Marsh, and whoever else thinks they're God in the rock-'n'-roll world-they're not. They're not; they're damn children. They're children. Excuse me, I'm mad.

30 May 2009, 03:43	#375
MeatGrl1 No Day But Today Join Date: 29.05.2006 Location: Sitting on the steps outside looking so restless and reckless and lost! Posts: 9,089	Not really funny just bloody annoying... I had a bit of a sneezing fit at work and this customer asks.... *"It's not swine flu is it?"* How rude !!! Felt like saying, 'If it was and I had would I be working ?!" But I didn't...