Nothing to see here (a.k.a. The Wedding Thread) - Page 15

mszee · 28 May 2006, 16:33

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lotus96

Lo, it must be the road to Damascus, cheer Loafers, for we have a convert amongst us... welcome to the way of the Loaf on this cheery morning, may thy day be blessed with rain, clouds, hurricanes and fewer of the living dead than normal, with only minimal interference from BabBazz and it's evil and loathesome messengers, on their way to the pits of mass destruction.

Good morning, oh faithful one!!!! It appears that groom might have had a few too many at this bachelor's party cause he ain't here. I hope I am not left at the altar.

It's a gorgeous morning here - sunny with a gentle breeze...and much fewer living dead than usual. Although motorcicles are still groaning with greasy pleasure.

God save us from BabBazz...and keep her away from this blessed day...

LONG LIVE MEAT LOAF!!!

L96 · 28 May 2006, 16:39

Hast thee been drinking, child?

dant796 · 28 May 2006, 16:41

Quote:

Originally Posted by mszee

Let the Loafdom prosper and long live Loaf!!!

In thine image you have created a groom...send your blessings to the bride.

For she is ready to commit in holy matrimony and in Loaf's name.

Long live Loaf and prosper!!! And let pop music forever stop haunting Steinman's pointed piano. Let Elvis rise from the ashes and bless this holy union with his rendition of Love Me Tender!!!

In the spirit of Loaf, Gatekeeper and the Pointed Piano...let us pray together!

LONG LIVE THE MEAT LOAF!!!

Tis truly a blessing to see that the bride has accepted the Loaf into her heart on this most joyous day! The BabBazz surely howls in fury and frustration, and the false Elvises (or it is Elvii?) thrash their pelvises (pelvii?) in ever increasing undulations, eventually hurling themselves from their unholy stage and into the roiling orchestra pit of infernal cacophany!

May the Loaf and his Gatekeeper smile upon thee and may the wrath of the pointed piano be averted from your repentent head!

L96 · 28 May 2006, 16:44

Well said, brother Dant, the Loaf shall surely reward thee with the ultimate blessing on the day of judgement, and send the wing of the bat to protect thee, ye shall certainly receive the guitar pick entry to paradise, whilst sinners around thee keep driving, the wolf at thine door shall be no more as thee forge ahead to the promised land with thine decadent wishes.

mszee · 28 May 2006, 16:59

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lotus96

Hast thee been drinking, child?

Not yet

L96 · 28 May 2006, 17:24

See the miracles that allowing the loaf into thine heart can create? For only hours ago, thee were a sinner of the worst kind, drunken, debauchen, brazen and ameoba like, and now, see thyself, clean and pure, as is the tree after a passing dog. Praise to the Loaf for this marvellous conversion, welcome to the fold, dear sister in the Loaf.

mszee · 28 May 2006, 18:44

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lotus96

See the miracles that allowing the loaf into thine heart can create? For only hours ago, thee were a sinner of the worst kind, drunken, debauchen, brazen and ameoba like, and now, see thyself, clean and pure, as is the tree after a passing dog. Praise to the Loaf for this marvellous conversion, welcome to the fold, dear sister in the Loaf.

I am very clean and pure...and better looking I think now

L96 · 29 May 2006, 08:59

Death is merely a means to an end. Tis written that death brings eternal torment, surely this cannot be worse than the torture we suffer our mortal lives? Post mortem the body can no longer truly suffer, pyhsical pain and sensation must become truly psychological, thus the only life after death agonies must be mental, not physical. Tis also written that we suffer in life in the name of the Loaf, unless we are true believers, in which case we are strong enough to withstand temptation and to henceforth stand strong and tall.

Do not forsake us now, oh Loaf and ruler of all, bring peace to the hearts of thine devoted followers, do not allow the dashboard lights to fade, the meter to run, nor the monster to be loose, for the monster within may be stronger than morality and societal obedience. Stand tall and walk with thy disciples, oh Loafy one, send the gatekeeper with the pointed piano to soothe the aggravated and agonised beast, lest the world suffer more than it needs.

mszee · 31 May 2006, 08:23

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lotus96

Death is merely a means to an end. Tis written that death brings eternal torment, surely this cannot be worse than the torture we suffer our mortal lives? Post mortem the body can no longer truly suffer, pyhsical pain and sensation must become truly psychological, thus the only life after death agonies must be mental, not physical. Tis also written that we suffer in life in the name of the Loaf, unless we are true believers, in which case we are strong enough to withstand temptation and to henceforth stand strong and tall.

Do not forsake us now, oh Loaf and ruler of all, bring peace to the hearts of thine devoted followers, do not allow the dashboard lights to fade, the meter to run, nor the monster to be loose, for the monster within may be stronger than morality and societal obedience. Stand tall and walk with thy disciples, oh Loafy one, send the gatekeeper with the pointed piano to soothe the aggravated and agonised beast, lest the world suffer more than it needs.

Geez...nothing to see here for real now...

L96 · 31 May 2006, 09:00

Oh dearest Loaf, life giver and healer of all evils, please look upon this child of thine with grace and mercy, for she knows not of what she speaks, forgive her the harsh words that pass her lips, allow her to see thee in all thine glory and renounce her evil ways, for the love of the Loaf can conquer all, do not condemn this misfortunate wretch to a pit of agony for all eternity, allow thine grace to enter her heart and save her from immortal torment.

mszee · 31 May 2006, 09:06

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lotus96

Oh dearest Loaf, life giver and healer of all evils, please look upon this child of thine with grace and mercy, for she knows not of what she speaks, forgive her the harsh words that pass her lips, allow her to see thee in all thine glory and renounce her evil ways, for the love of the Loaf can conquer all, do not condemn this misfortunate wretch to a pit of agony for all eternity, allow thine grace to enter her heart and save her from immortal torment.

Well, this is much better - thanks for the prayer! I do need it...

L96 · 05 Jun 2006, 09:30

I must apologise, child of the Loaf, for 'twould seem that we have been cast out of the Holy place, thrown from our refuge in the seas of this troubled world, for the Loafer known as Mouse has demolished our sacred place of worship in order to aid the perfidious BabBazz in it's conquest of the world, thus we are forced to worship together in this simple and primitive thread... for the Mouse did build the church, for the Rockette did invite this humble servant to take up dwelling there, ye thineself invited this Preacher to minister to thee there, and the BabBazz invades the consciousness of the Mouse and forces he into heresy and traitorship, and thus doth he betray us all in the name of the Loaf, for as he wishes, so the BabBazz shall pervade the earth, inflicting upon it it's perfidious and insidious odour, nostril hair and smell, for thee shalt never see the thing thee calls the sun again, and the worst of it shalt be reserved for the one they call the Mouse, for 'twas him that sent us from the safe place into this tumultuous area of sin and misery, should thine soul be in agony for all eternity, whilst the Mouse picks thine ribs out one by one with his knitting needles, then so be it, for thine false idol and legitimately called loved one ghost cast thee thus, so for to blame the Loaf and the gatekeeper of the pointed piano would be mere tomfoolery on behalf of his children, for though they suckle at the oranges of life, of the nipples of the divine Loaf, they shalt be cast aside like frogs at a liquorice picnic, where the teddybears cease to play and thy spirit scream sin the eternal damnation of the tune of the BabBazz, for that is where no sun shall shine, where blood and misery roam the streets, and thee dare to compare us to a ":real" church, Mr Mouse? For what 'tis a real church bar a place for the impersonation of the dangerous BabBazz and a place for the false idols to gather and gallop upon the heath of the evergreen Scotland, yea though thee think thee may have vanquished those of the Loaf by thine false pretences, thee shalt need to apply much more thought to thine infideliast campaign of disrighteousness and anger, for thee shall be doomed, unless the accept the Loaf and repent, for thine time shall come, oh evil one, and the guitar pick of peace wielded by the gatekeeper of the pointed piano shalt smite thee all, and lo I may have the power to save thee from thine sin and misery, I shall not accept thee, nor recommend the Loaf to accept thee, for thine traitorous conduct has been noted, damn the to Streisand and Manilow, in the name of the Loaf I commit the thine judgement and eternal agony, and thee shalt not be mortal and thus relieve the agony and misery of thine punishment for thy guilty conscience, in the name of the Loaf begone.

**The Flying Mouse** · 05 Jun 2006, 13:48

The previous post breaks so many forum rules it's unbelievable.

1.The questioning of a moderators decission in public.
2.Personal attacks.
3.Flaming.
4.Starting/using another thread to carry on a topic a moderator has already deemed out of bounds.
5.Confusing a moderator.

Thread - locked
Key - thrown away.
Preacher - burnt at the stake.

Any more threads we'd like locked today?

28 May 2006, 16:39	#352
L96 Inaugural goldfish winner Join Date: 04.07.2005 Location: In a handbasket. Believe me, for someone my height, it's hell... Posts: 2,373	Hast thee been drinking, child?

28 May 2006, 16:44	#354
L96 Inaugural goldfish winner Join Date: 04.07.2005 Location: In a handbasket. Believe me, for someone my height, it's hell... Posts: 2,373	Well said, brother Dant, the Loaf shall surely reward thee with the ultimate blessing on the day of judgement, and send the wing of the bat to protect thee, ye shall certainly receive the guitar pick entry to paradise, whilst sinners around thee keep driving, the wolf at thine door shall be no more as thee forge ahead to the promised land with thine decadent wishes.

28 May 2006, 17:24	#356
L96 Inaugural goldfish winner Join Date: 04.07.2005 Location: In a handbasket. Believe me, for someone my height, it's hell... Posts: 2,373	See the miracles that allowing the loaf into thine heart can create? For only hours ago, thee were a sinner of the worst kind, drunken, debauchen, brazen and ameoba like, and now, see thyself, clean and pure, as is the tree after a passing dog. Praise to the Loaf for this marvellous conversion, welcome to the fold, dear sister in the Loaf.

29 May 2006, 08:59	#358
L96 Inaugural goldfish winner Join Date: 04.07.2005 Location: In a handbasket. Believe me, for someone my height, it's hell... Posts: 2,373	Death is merely a means to an end. Tis written that death brings eternal torment, surely this cannot be worse than the torture we suffer our mortal lives? Post mortem the body can no longer truly suffer, pyhsical pain and sensation must become truly psychological, thus the only life after death agonies must be mental, not physical. Tis also written that we suffer in life in the name of the Loaf, unless we are true believers, in which case we are strong enough to withstand temptation and to henceforth stand strong and tall. Do not forsake us now, oh Loaf and ruler of all, bring peace to the hearts of thine devoted followers, do not allow the dashboard lights to fade, the meter to run, nor the monster to be loose, for the monster within may be stronger than morality and societal obedience. Stand tall and walk with thy disciples, oh Loafy one, send the gatekeeper with the pointed piano to soothe the aggravated and agonised beast, lest the world suffer more than it needs.

31 May 2006, 09:00	#360
L96 Inaugural goldfish winner Join Date: 04.07.2005 Location: In a handbasket. Believe me, for someone my height, it's hell... Posts: 2,373	Oh dearest Loaf, life giver and healer of all evils, please look upon this child of thine with grace and mercy, for she knows not of what she speaks, forgive her the harsh words that pass her lips, allow her to see thee in all thine glory and renounce her evil ways, for the love of the Loaf can conquer all, do not condemn this misfortunate wretch to a pit of agony for all eternity, allow thine grace to enter her heart and save her from immortal torment.

05 Jun 2006, 09:30	#362
L96 Inaugural goldfish winner Join Date: 04.07.2005 Location: In a handbasket. Believe me, for someone my height, it's hell... Posts: 2,373	I must apologise, child of the Loaf, for 'twould seem that we have been cast out of the Holy place, thrown from our refuge in the seas of this troubled world, for the Loafer known as Mouse has demolished our sacred place of worship in order to aid the perfidious BabBazz in it's conquest of the world, thus we are forced to worship together in this simple and primitive thread... for the Mouse did build the church, for the Rockette did invite this humble servant to take up dwelling there, ye thineself invited this Preacher to minister to thee there, and the BabBazz invades the consciousness of the Mouse and forces he into heresy and traitorship, and thus doth he betray us all in the name of the Loaf, for as he wishes, so the BabBazz shall pervade the earth, inflicting upon it it's perfidious and insidious odour, nostril hair and smell, for thee shalt never see the thing thee calls the sun again, and the worst of it shalt be reserved for the one they call the Mouse, for 'twas him that sent us from the safe place into this tumultuous area of sin and misery, should thine soul be in agony for all eternity, whilst the Mouse picks thine ribs out one by one with his knitting needles, then so be it, for thine false idol and legitimately called loved one ghost cast thee thus, so for to blame the Loaf and the gatekeeper of the pointed piano would be mere tomfoolery on behalf of his children, for though they suckle at the oranges of life, of the nipples of the divine Loaf, they shalt be cast aside like frogs at a liquorice picnic, where the teddybears cease to play and thy spirit scream sin the eternal damnation of the tune of the BabBazz, for that is where no sun shall shine, where blood and misery roam the streets, and thee dare to compare us to a ":real" church, Mr Mouse? For what 'tis a real church bar a place for the impersonation of the dangerous BabBazz and a place for the false idols to gather and gallop upon the heath of the evergreen Scotland, yea though thee think thee may have vanquished those of the Loaf by thine false pretences, thee shalt need to apply much more thought to thine infideliast campaign of disrighteousness and anger, for thee shall be doomed, unless the accept the Loaf and repent, for thine time shall come, oh evil one, and the guitar pick of peace wielded by the gatekeeper of the pointed piano shalt smite thee all, and lo I may have the power to save thee from thine sin and misery, I shall not accept thee, nor recommend the Loaf to accept thee, for thine traitorous conduct has been noted, damn the to Streisand and Manilow, in the name of the Loaf I commit the thine judgement and eternal agony, and thee shalt not be mortal and thus relieve the agony and misery of thine punishment for thy guilty conscience, in the name of the Loaf begone.

05 Jun 2006, 13:48	#363
The Flying Mouse Armed ba$tard and Jo's other half. Join Date: 06.08.2002 Location: In the middle of nowhere near the end of the line. Posts: 16,104	The previous post breaks so many forum rules it's unbelievable. 1.The questioning of a moderators decission in public. 2.Personal attacks. 3.Flaming. 4.Starting/using another thread to carry on a topic a moderator has already deemed out of bounds. 5.Confusing a moderator. Thread - locked Key - thrown away. Preacher - burnt at the stake. Any more threads we'd like locked today?