Bumper Stickers...

MBrevard · 24 Jun 2003, 10:15

Bumper Stickers You'll Probably Never See

I love animals, they taste great.
EARTH FIRST! We'll stripmine the other planets later.
"Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes."
Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
I'm as confused as a baby in a topless bar.
"Criminal Lawyer" is a redundancy.
Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
Sometimes I wake up grumpy; Other times I let him sleep
Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.
Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
All generalizations are false, including this one.
Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.
Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.
I won't rise to the occasion, but I'll slide over to it.
Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
Forget about World Peace.....Visualize Using Your Turn Signal
Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.
i Suport publik edducation
Okay, who put a "stop payment" on my reality check?
Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
We have enough youth, how about a fountain of SMART?
Cover me. I'm changing lanes.
Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

Anybody have any others??

Love,
MB
xxx

Chris · 24 Jun 2003, 10:48

A couple of genuine ones:

Mine reads: Get Revenge, Sh*t on a pigeon!

have also seen:

If you can read this, who the hell nicked my caravan?

And recently saw one on the back of a motorcyclists jackets which read:

If you can read this, the wife wasn't holding on properly!

Asha · 24 Jun 2003, 13:03

Like some of them a lot, try these on for size:

Get in, Sit down, Shut up HANG ON

Don't Worry! We're from the Government. You're Safe Now!

Relax! Youll Get There.

I THINK THEREFORE IM DANGEROUS

Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did. Only Backwards and in High-Heels

I do whatever the deities in my head tell me to....

there are 10 types of people: those who understand binary and those who don't

Never drive faster then your angel can fly

I'm only driving because my dragon is tired

Everything that s*cks is not necessarily bad *vampire*

Did you ever stop and think....and forget to start again?

I live in another dimension, but i have a summer home in reality

Everything I like is either immoral, Illegal or fattening

I'm always in trouble but it is soooo much fun

Once you have pulled the pin from Mr. Grenade, he's no llonger your friend

I'm not obnoxious, I'm tact challenged

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot changes, the courage to change the things I can, and the weaponry to make all the difference

Psychoamazonwarbitch from Hell with an Attitude

If I could get a grip on reality, I'd choke it

I love my country, it's the government I fear

Against Abortion, have a Vasectomy

Back Off!! I'm a Goddess

My Karma just ran over your dogma

My other car is a broom

Well, my longest post to date,

Have fun
Asha

Wild_Honey · 24 Jun 2003, 14:40

I THINK I have some more; but forgive me if I have some repeats in there.

- Lost your cat? Try looking under my tyres!

- I am not drunk! That's the usual way I drive!

- No reason to live but I like it that way.

- I love cats! They taste like chicken!

- Join the Army! Travel around, see many places, meet nice people and kill them.

*********************************************
"I'd lie for you - and that's the truth..."
*********************************************

heat · 24 Jun 2003, 15:44

Best one i ever saw was

'Jesus loves you...but everyone else thinks you're a C**T'!!!!!!

It amused me....

R. · 24 Jun 2003, 18:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chris

If you can read this, the wife wasn't holding on properly!

This is a little bit different - it's a T shirt and looks like this:

Testify · 24 Jun 2003, 18:21

hehe nice one!!

Wild_Honey · 24 Jun 2003, 20:31

- Whoops! …Was that YOUR cat!?

- F*** you you f***in’ f***!

- Two things are endless: The universe and human stupidity, but I am not yet sure about the universe… (Albert Einstein)

- I just drive like that in order to get on your nerves.

- Same shit – different day

- If you come any closer, please introduce yourself!

- You may be much faster than me… but I am driving in FRONT of you!

- Jesus is coming – look busy!

heat · 24 Jun 2003, 22:27

Here's a couple more...

Jesus saves.......Greenshield stamps

I am woman, don't give me sh it

If you think i'm a bitch, you obviously haven't met my mother

The only reason men were invented is because dildo's can't get the drinks in

MBrevard · 25 Jun 2003, 12:52

Hope there aren't too many reruns in these:

Honk if you've never seen an Uzi fired from a car window.
If you can beat me, you can eat me! (seen on a Corvette driven by a "drop-dead gorgeous blonde")
Remember: Stop lights timed for 35mph are also timed for 70mph.
GUYS: No shirt, no service. GALS: No shirt, no charge.
Heart Attacks...God's Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends
Boldly going nowhere.
Cat: The other white meat.
Eat Well, Stay Fit, Die Anyway
He's not dead, He's electro-encephalographically challenged
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, riddle them with bullets
If you lived in your car, you'd be home by now
WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition

Love,
MB
xxx

Testify · 25 Jun 2003, 15:03

heat · 25 Jun 2003, 15:08

Saw this one on ebay

And on the 8th day, God created....Meat Loaf!!!!

Testify · 25 Jun 2003, 15:19

nice one!!

MBrevard · 25 Jun 2003, 20:29

Ah, Heat I want THAT one!!!!

Love,
MB
xxx

Testify · 25 Jun 2003, 21:18

if i had a car i would have that!!

this gives me an idea!!

always thought my mums car looked abit plain just bein white!! hehehehehe

Wild_Honey · 26 Jun 2003, 12:31

Here's some more.

- I think, therefore I am not you.

- If cats could talk, they wouldn't.

- If God is within I hope He likes Enchiladas.

- It's not dying that bothers me. It's the not being here anymore.

- The older I get, the better I was.

- The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese!

- When your only tool is a hammer, all problems start to look like nails.

MBrevard · 26 Jun 2003, 12:47

Oh, I LOVE those, Wild_Honey!! Thanks for sharing them!

Got my morning off to a great start!!!

Love,
MB
xxx

Asha · 26 Jun 2003, 15:39

Nice ones, I love the one about Meat, I have to have that on my car

Asha

aussielovesmeat · 26 Jun 2003, 15:46

Saw this one the other day, my other half wasn't amused, but it cracked me up completely

All Men Are Idiots.......and I Married their King

heat · 27 Jun 2003, 06:18

That is sooo true - if you got the king, i certianly got his bloody jester.....

aussielovesmeat · 27 Jun 2003, 14:58

Good one Heat.......

Asha · 27 Jun 2003, 21:47

Thx Heat, for cracking me up...

Asha

R. · 27 Jun 2003, 22:06

Certainly off topic ... But just a little bit.

Asha · 27 Jun 2003, 22:10

R. are you a Turkey, or do you have a Bumper Dumper?!

Asha

heat · 27 Jun 2003, 23:04

I'd say R. has a Bumper Dumper

Me, just call me turkey...... :P

24 Jun 2003, 10:15	#1
MBrevard Super Loafer Join Date: 06.02.2003 Location: Deceased Posts: 761	Bumper Stickers... Bumper Stickers You'll Probably Never See I love animals, they taste great. EARTH FIRST! We'll stripmine the other planets later. "Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes." Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies. I'm as confused as a baby in a topless bar. "Criminal Lawyer" is a redundancy. Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot. He who laughs last thinks slowest. Sometimes I wake up grumpy; Other times I let him sleep Give me ambiguity or give me something else. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries. Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math. All generalizations are false, including this one. Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot. Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now. I won't rise to the occasion, but I'll slide over to it. Consciousness: that annoying time between naps. I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it. Where there's a will, I want to be in it. Forget about World Peace.....Visualize Using Your Turn Signal Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear. i Suport publik edducation Okay, who put a "stop payment" on my reality check? Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs. We have enough youth, how about a fountain of SMART? Cover me. I'm changing lanes. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes. Anybody have any others?? Love, MB xxx

25 Jun 2003, 12:52	#10
MBrevard Super Loafer Join Date: 06.02.2003 Location: Deceased Posts: 761	Hope there aren't too many reruns in these: Honk if you've never seen an Uzi fired from a car window. If you can beat me, you can eat me! (seen on a Corvette driven by a "drop-dead gorgeous blonde") Remember: Stop lights timed for 35mph are also timed for 70mph. GUYS: No shirt, no service. GALS: No shirt, no charge. Heart Attacks...God's Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends Boldly going nowhere. Cat: The other white meat. Eat Well, Stay Fit, Die Anyway He's not dead, He's electro-encephalographically challenged If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, riddle them with bullets If you lived in your car, you'd be home by now WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition Love, MB xxx

24 Jun 2003, 10:48	#2
Chris Mega Loafer Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Somewhere in the real world. Posts: 7,527	A couple of genuine ones: Mine reads: Get Revenge, Sh*t on a pigeon! have also seen: If you can read this, who the hell nicked my caravan? And recently saw one on the back of a motorcyclists jackets which read: If you can read this, the wife wasn't holding on properly!

24 Jun 2003, 13:03	#3
Asha Mega Loafer Join Date: 05.05.2003 Location: Somewhere out there Posts: 1,356	Like some of them a lot, try these on for size: Get in, Sit down, Shut up HANG ON Don't Worry! We're from the Government. You're Safe Now! Relax! Youll Get There. I THINK THEREFORE IM DANGEROUS Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did. Only Backwards and in High-Heels I do whatever the deities in my head tell me to.... there are 10 types of people: those who understand binary and those who don't Never drive faster then your angel can fly I'm only driving because my dragon is tired Everything that scks is not necessarily bad vampire* Did you ever stop and think....and forget to start again? I live in another dimension, but i have a summer home in reality Everything I like is either immoral, Illegal or fattening I'm always in trouble but it is soooo much fun Once you have pulled the pin from Mr. Grenade, he's no llonger your friend I'm not obnoxious, I'm tact challenged God, grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot changes, the courage to change the things I can, and the weaponry to make all the difference Psychoamazonwarbitch from Hell with an Attitude If I could get a grip on reality, I'd choke it I love my country, it's the government I fear Against Abortion, have a Vasectomy Back Off!! I'm a Goddess My Karma just ran over your dogma My other car is a broom Well, my longest post to date, Have fun Asha

24 Jun 2003, 14:40	#4
Wild_Honey Super Loafer Join Date: 23.03.2003 Location: Windeck, Germany Posts: 606	I THINK I have some more; but forgive me if I have some repeats in there. - Lost your cat? Try looking under my tyres! - I am not drunk! That's the usual way I drive! - No reason to live but I like it that way. - I love cats! They taste like chicken! - Join the Army! Travel around, see many places, meet nice people and kill them. ******************************************* "I'd lie for you - and that's the truth..." *******************************************

24 Jun 2003, 15:44	#5
heat Rampant Loafer... Join Date: 29.07.2002 Location: welshy wales Posts: 5,706	Best one i ever saw was 'Jesus loves you...but everyone else thinks you're a C**T'!!!!!! It amused me....

24 Jun 2003, 18:21	#7
Testify ragamuffin Join Date: 21.05.2003 Location: xxx daydreaming xxx Posts: 5,023	hehe nice one!!

24 Jun 2003, 20:31	#8
Wild_Honey Super Loafer Join Date: 23.03.2003 Location: Windeck, Germany Posts: 606	- Whoops! …Was that YOUR cat!? - F* you you fin’ f**! - Two things are endless: The universe and human stupidity, but I am not yet sure about the universe… (Albert Einstein) - I just drive like that in order to get on your nerves. - Same shit – different day - If you come any closer, please introduce yourself! - You may be much faster than me… but I am driving in FRONT of you! - Jesus is coming – look busy!

24 Jun 2003, 22:27	#9
heat Rampant Loafer... Join Date: 29.07.2002 Location: welshy wales Posts: 5,706	Here's a couple more... Jesus saves.......Greenshield stamps I am woman, don't give me sh it If you think i'm a bitch, you obviously haven't met my mother The only reason men were invented is because dildo's can't get the drinks in

25 Jun 2003, 15:03	#11
Testify ragamuffin Join Date: 21.05.2003 Location: xxx daydreaming xxx Posts: 5,023

25 Jun 2003, 15:08	#12
heat Rampant Loafer... Join Date: 29.07.2002 Location: welshy wales Posts: 5,706	Saw this one on ebay And on the 8th day, God created....Meat Loaf!!!!

25 Jun 2003, 15:19	#13
Testify ragamuffin Join Date: 21.05.2003 Location: xxx daydreaming xxx Posts: 5,023	nice one!!

25 Jun 2003, 20:29	#14
MBrevard Super Loafer Join Date: 06.02.2003 Location: Deceased Posts: 761	Ah, Heat I want THAT one!!!! Love, MB xxx

25 Jun 2003, 21:18	#15
Testify ragamuffin Join Date: 21.05.2003 Location: xxx daydreaming xxx Posts: 5,023	if i had a car i would have that!! this gives me an idea!! always thought my mums car looked abit plain just bein white!! hehehehehe

26 Jun 2003, 12:31	#16
Wild_Honey Super Loafer Join Date: 23.03.2003 Location: Windeck, Germany Posts: 606	Here's some more. - I think, therefore I am not you. - If cats could talk, they wouldn't. - If God is within I hope He likes Enchiladas. - It's not dying that bothers me. It's the not being here anymore. - The older I get, the better I was. - The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese! - When your only tool is a hammer, all problems start to look like nails.

26 Jun 2003, 12:47	#17
MBrevard Super Loafer Join Date: 06.02.2003 Location: Deceased Posts: 761	Oh, I LOVE those, Wild_Honey!! Thanks for sharing them! Got my morning off to a great start!!! Love, MB xxx

26 Jun 2003, 15:39	#18
Asha Mega Loafer Join Date: 05.05.2003 Location: Somewhere out there Posts: 1,356	Nice ones, I love the one about Meat, I have to have that on my car Asha

26 Jun 2003, 15:46	#19
aussielovesmeat Loafer Join Date: 08.05.2003 Location: South Australia Posts: 91	Saw this one the other day, my other half wasn't amused, but it cracked me up completely All Men Are Idiots.......and I Married their King

27 Jun 2003, 06:18	#20
heat Rampant Loafer... Join Date: 29.07.2002 Location: welshy wales Posts: 5,706	That is sooo true - if you got the king, i certianly got his bloody jester.....

27 Jun 2003, 14:58	#21
aussielovesmeat Loafer Join Date: 08.05.2003 Location: South Australia Posts: 91	Good one Heat.......

27 Jun 2003, 21:47	#22
Asha Mega Loafer Join Date: 05.05.2003 Location: Somewhere out there Posts: 1,356	Thx Heat, for cracking me up... Asha

27 Jun 2003, 22:06	#23
R. You dig. Join Date: 02.04.2002 Location: On the fothermucker Posts: 7,179	Certainly off topic ... But just a little bit.

27 Jun 2003, 22:10	#24
Asha Mega Loafer Join Date: 05.05.2003 Location: Somewhere out there Posts: 1,356	R. are you a Turkey, or do you have a Bumper Dumper?! Asha

27 Jun 2003, 23:04	#25
heat Rampant Loafer... Join Date: 29.07.2002 Location: welshy wales Posts: 5,706	I'd say R. has a Bumper Dumper Me, just call me turkey...... :P