The Purina Diet

R. · 01 Aug 2006, 20:56

"I used to have a Labrador retriever & was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart, waiting in the check-out line. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time. But, I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry, as the food is nutritionally complete. So, I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, especially a tall heavy man behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd been poisoned.

JanT · 01 Aug 2006, 22:06

ROFL

Hypnobabe · 02 Aug 2006, 01:12

Lol... I got the exact same thing in an e-mail today... made me giggle then too....

*AndyK* · 02 Aug 2006, 09:26

Ageing Bat · 02 Aug 2006, 09:30

Benny · 02 Aug 2006, 14:13

Gez · 02 Aug 2006, 18:52

01 Aug 2006, 20:56	#1
R. You dig. Join Date: 02.04.2002 Location: On the fothermucker Posts: 7,179	The Purina Diet "I used to have a Labrador retriever & was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart, waiting in the check-out line. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time. But, I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry, as the food is nutritionally complete. So, I was going to try it again. I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, especially a tall heavy man behind her. Horrified, she asked if I'd been poisoned. I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me. The tall guy nearly had to stagger out of the store, oxygen-depleted from laughter. I paid for the food and left a lot of smiles behind me. "

01 Aug 2006, 22:06	#2
JanT Mega Loafer Join Date: 22.06.2006 Location: Blackpool Posts: 2,232	ROFL

02 Aug 2006, 01:12	#3
Hypnobabe mszee's Mistress with sexy goddess boots Join Date: 13.07.2005 Location: Hitting the highway like a battering ram... Posts: 7,686	Lol... I got the exact same thing in an e-mail today... made me giggle then too....

02 Aug 2006, 09:26	#4
AndyK Relentless Join Date: 21.11.2003 Location: Over the top..... seeing what's on the other side Posts: 18,694

02 Aug 2006, 09:30	#5
Ageing Bat Young at heart. Slightly older in other places. Join Date: 20.11.2003 Location: Here! Posts: 1,311

02 Aug 2006, 14:13	#6
Benny Massive Loafer Join Date: 07.09.2005 Location: Posts: 3,084

02 Aug 2006, 18:52	#7
Gez Knicker thief Join Date: 17.04.2003 Location: auch...not on the fence Posts: 5,633