An Audience With God...

heat · 09 Jun 2003, 07:01

Whatever your faith, whatever God you believe in, say you had 3 questions you could ask him/her/it, what would they be, and why???

Here we go...

1. So youre real then?

2. What came first, the chicken or the egg?

3. Why do you always make it rain on Bank Holidays?

Shane · 09 Jun 2003, 11:39

Quote:

Originally Posted by heat

Whatever your faith, whatever God you believe in, say you had 3 questions you could ask him/her/it, what would they be, and why???

Here we go...

1. So youre real then?

2. What came first, the chicken or the egg?

3. Why do you always make it rain on Bank Holidays?

I don't `believe in' any god at the moment, but if one suddenly appeared, I would ask him/her/it:

1 What do you think about the way the world and its people have evolved (morally/socially) since you were last here? Would you make any revisions to the Bible/Koran/whatever in light of this (eg on homosexuality, adultery etc)?

2 Why have you chosen this time and place in which to appear? Why have you come?

3 Can you make CHSIB go to number 1 in the US when it comes out there?

MBrevard · 09 Jun 2003, 11:43

Oh, Shane!!! You KNEW I'd LOVE that last one!!!!!

Can't we make that Question Number 1 and Number 2, as well?!!!!

The US is a BIG place--we need 'em all!!!

Thanks, Shane! Got my day off to a GREAT start!!!

Love ya,
MB
xxx

mariella · 09 Jun 2003, 11:47

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shane

Quote:

Originally Posted by heat

Whatever your faith, whatever God you believe in, say you had 3 questions you could ask him/her/it, what would they be, and why???

Here we go...

1. So youre real then?

2. What came first, the chicken or the egg?

3. Why do you always make it rain on Bank Holidays?

I don't `believe in' any god at the moment, but if one suddenly appeared, I would ask him/her/it:

1 What do you think about the way the world and its people have evolved (morally/socially) since you were last here? Would you make any revisions to the Bible/Koran/whatever in light of this (eg on homosexuality, adultery etc)?

2 Why have you chosen this time and place in which to appear? Why have you come?

3 Can you make CHSIB go to number 1 in the US when it comes out there?

Don't believe in any particular God also. Do 'pray' at times though, just not sure which God I am praying to.

Shane, love the CHSIB comment!

Great day (or is it night?) to you!

Mariella

Kat · 09 Jun 2003, 13:13

Trouble is you'dprobaby end up getting some wise arse God who says:
"Well yes of course I can make CHSIB get to number 1, I'm Ogd for crying out loud, but I don't want so I'm not going to " :P

White of High · 10 Jun 2003, 13:49

Quote:

Originally Posted by heat

Here we go...

1. So youre real then?

2. What came first, the chicken or the egg?

C'mon Heat!
Step over it! What a stupid questions are they? I'm real and God's never taken that question 'what came first, the chicken or the egg?'! I'm not very good in English so I can't explain it to you. Step over! Look into the depth of the things.

That you learn!
My 1st question:

How can you explain the earthquakes after the wars? I'm studing abou it and the scientists say the bombs never do earthquake. There was Yugoslavia and after Turkey (10 000 people)! There was Afganistan and after India (35 000 people) and now Algeria! How?

My 2nd question:
How can you explain the origin of the matter? There was The Big-Bang! But before?

Well, think at now!

Chris · 10 Jun 2003, 21:34

As i am a much lapsed atheist (figure that one out) I don't really believe in anything much (except beer, sex and fun!!!) so my first words, if god appeared, would have to be "Oh sugar, picked the wrong option didn't I? I'll get my coat"

I would ask:

1. Why do only the good die young? (Freddie Mercury, Janis Jolin, John Lennon, James Dean et al.)

2. Who really stood on the "Grassy Knoll?"

3. Microsoft. Why?????

However to annoy everyone i would like to point out that froma strictly theological point of view, everyone must be dammed! You can only be a member of 1 religion. All religions have some form of hell for non-believers ergo there must be a religion in which you are classed as a non-believer and are condemmed!!!

White of High · 10 Jun 2003, 21:42

Chris!
Just one thing!
God and religion aren't same things. I'm a believer, I have faith...

Kat · 11 Jun 2003, 01:36

Chris I love u for ur third question although personally I would rather know why JANIS JOPLIN and jim morrison died young

Shane · 11 Jun 2003, 02:16

Another thing I might ask God if I saw him:

"Hi Meat, how are you today?"

MBrevard · 11 Jun 2003, 03:57

Hey, Shane! Have I told you that I like the way you think??!!!

And to Chris, if Shane's premise is correct, you COULD ask God about your second question, since Meat says he knows the answer to that one!!!

Love,
MB
xxx

Rob The Badger · 11 Jun 2003, 13:08

1. What's it all for?
2. If you love us us, why do you let us suffer. If you can do something about it and don't, surely this means you don't love us?
3. Is there such a thing as love.

Or of course, then comes The Babel Fish,
Now it is such a bizarrely impossible
coincidence that anything so mind-bogglingly useful could
have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have
chosen to see it as a final and clinching proof of the
nonexistence of God. The arguement goes something like
this:

"I refuse to prove that I exist," says God, "for proof
denies faith, and without faith I am nothing."

"But," say Man, "the Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't
it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you
exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't.
QED."

"Oh dear," says God, "I hadn't though of that" and promply
vanishes in a proud puff of logic."

Chris · 11 Jun 2003, 21:15

Aha Eyeore, your secret is out, Isn't that from The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy?? Does this mean you are a froody guy who always knows where his towel is?

I would ask about Janis Joplin as well!!!!!

I would also ask, "If you are an omnipotent all-powerful god who created the universe and all it's contents from the smallest amoeba to the largest star, could you please explain women to me?" - But i would have to wait 'til everyone else had asked there questions as there wouldn't be time otherwise!!!!

Rob The Badger · 12 Jun 2003, 20:12

Ah! Ya got me

But I'd ask him one more thing:

"God, why don't you put the lyrics to John Lennon's 'Imagine' in the Bible?"

Chris · 12 Jun 2003, 20:19

Because it is a large pile of smelly substance!!! Sorry but I hate that song.

Rob The Badger · 13 Jun 2003, 21:46

Blashemer!

09 Jun 2003, 07:01	#1
heat Rampant Loafer... Join Date: 29.07.2002 Location: welshy wales Posts: 5,706	An Audience With God... Whatever your faith, whatever God you believe in, say you had 3 questions you could ask him/her/it, what would they be, and why??? Here we go... 1. So youre real then? 2. What came first, the chicken or the egg? 3. Why do you always make it rain on Bank Holidays?

09 Jun 2003, 11:43	#3
MBrevard Super Loafer Join Date: 06.02.2003 Location: Deceased Posts: 761	Oh, Shane!!! You KNEW I'd LOVE that last one!!!!! Can't we make that Question Number 1 and Number 2, as well?!!!! The US is a BIG place--we need 'em all!!! Thanks, Shane! Got my day off to a GREAT start!!! Love ya, MB xxx

09 Jun 2003, 13:13	#5
Kat Senior Loafer Join Date: 28.04.2003 Location: Somerset, UK Posts: 148	Trouble is you'dprobaby end up getting some wise arse God who says: "Well yes of course I can make CHSIB get to number 1, I'm Ogd for crying out loud, but I don't want so I'm not going to " :P

10 Jun 2003, 21:34	#7
Chris Mega Loafer Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Somewhere in the real world. Posts: 7,527	As i am a much lapsed atheist (figure that one out) I don't really believe in anything much (except beer, sex and fun!!!) so my first words, if god appeared, would have to be "Oh sugar, picked the wrong option didn't I? I'll get my coat" I would ask: 1. Why do only the good die young? (Freddie Mercury, Janis Jolin, John Lennon, James Dean et al.) 2. Who really stood on the "Grassy Knoll?" 3. Microsoft. Why????? However to annoy everyone i would like to point out that froma strictly theological point of view, everyone must be dammed! You can only be a member of 1 religion. All religions have some form of hell for non-believers ergo there must be a religion in which you are classed as a non-believer and are condemmed!!!

10 Jun 2003, 21:42	#8
White of High Nature's Siegfried Join Date: 27.05.2002 Location: Budapest, Hungary Posts: 2,930	Chris! Just one thing! God and religion aren't same things. I'm a believer, I have faith...

11 Jun 2003, 01:36	#9
Kat Senior Loafer Join Date: 28.04.2003 Location: Somerset, UK Posts: 148	Chris I love u for ur third question although personally I would rather know why JANIS JOPLIN and jim morrison died young

11 Jun 2003, 02:16	#10
Shane Super Loafer Join Date: 30.04.2002 Location: Palmerston North, New Zealand (GMT+12) Posts: 608	Another thing I might ask God if I saw him: "Hi Meat, how are you today?"

11 Jun 2003, 03:57	#11
MBrevard Super Loafer Join Date: 06.02.2003 Location: Deceased Posts: 761	Hey, Shane! Have I told you that I like the way you think??!!! And to Chris, if Shane's premise is correct, you COULD ask God about your second question, since Meat says he knows the answer to that one!!! Love, MB xxx

11 Jun 2003, 13:08	#12
Rob The Badger Too sexy for this post Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Manchester, UK Posts: 2,895	1. What's it all for? 2. If you love us us, why do you let us suffer. If you can do something about it and don't, surely this means you don't love us? 3. Is there such a thing as love. Or of course, then comes The Babel Fish, Now it is such a bizarrely impossible coincidence that anything so mind-bogglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as a final and clinching proof of the nonexistence of God. The arguement goes something like this: "I refuse to prove that I exist," says God, "for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing." "But," say Man, "the Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't. QED." "Oh dear," says God, "I hadn't though of that" and promply vanishes in a proud puff of logic."

11 Jun 2003, 21:15	#13
Chris Mega Loafer Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Somewhere in the real world. Posts: 7,527	Aha Eyeore, your secret is out, Isn't that from The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy?? Does this mean you are a froody guy who always knows where his towel is? I would ask about Janis Joplin as well!!!!! I would also ask, "If you are an omnipotent all-powerful god who created the universe and all it's contents from the smallest amoeba to the largest star, could you please explain women to me?" - But i would have to wait 'til everyone else had asked there questions as there wouldn't be time otherwise!!!!

12 Jun 2003, 20:12	#14
Rob The Badger Too sexy for this post Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Manchester, UK Posts: 2,895	Ah! Ya got me But I'd ask him one more thing: "God, why don't you put the lyrics to John Lennon's 'Imagine' in the Bible?"

12 Jun 2003, 20:19	#15
Chris Mega Loafer Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Somewhere in the real world. Posts: 7,527	Because it is a large pile of smelly substance!!! Sorry but I hate that song.

13 Jun 2003, 21:46	#16
Rob The Badger Too sexy for this post Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Manchester, UK Posts: 2,895	Blashemer!