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DIZZY DRUMMER · 23 Jun 2005, 17:15

A little extreme, but effective, I'm sure '-)

AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

1 If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a
cup of boiling water down your throat and presto. The blockage
will be almost instantly removed.

2 Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by
getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

3 Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by
simply using the sink.

4 For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and
bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins.
Remember to use a timer.

5 A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent
you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the
snooze button.

6 If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then
you will be afraid to cough.

7 Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you
will forget about the toothache.

Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really
are:

You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape.
If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40.
If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

23 Jun 2005, 17:15	#1
DIZZY DRUMMER Always Ready For A Bang Join Date: 30.11.2003 Location: Left In The Dark .......... AGAIN Posts: 6,389	Amazing Simple Home Remedies A little extreme, but effective, I'm sure '-) AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES 1 If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto. The blockage will be almost instantly removed. 2 Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away. 3 Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply using the sink. 4 For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer. 5 A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. 6 If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough. 7 Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget about the toothache. Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are: You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.