Eddie's Teddy
29 Aug 2006, 10:39
In case you needed further proof that the world has gone potty, here
are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do
not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
==========================
On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)
===========================
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a
car
or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction
accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off
those bulldozers.)
==========================
On Marks &Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot
after heating."
(..and you thought????...)
=======================
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while
sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to
work on my hair.)
====================================
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No
purchase
necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)
===========================
On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular
soap."
(and that would be???....)
============================
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion:
Defrost."
(but, it's just a suggestion.)
========================
On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes
on body."
(but wouldn't this save me time?)
==============================
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(.I'm taking this because???....)
==============================
On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or
outdoor use only."
(as opposed to what?)
==========================
On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the
other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit
curious.)
==============================
On an American Airlines packet of nuts --
"Instructions:
Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: say what?)
===========================
On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this
garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for
this
one.)
========================
On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain
with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God..was there a lot of this happening
somewhere?)
Just got that in an email. It tickled me anyway.:D
are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do
not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
==========================
On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)
===========================
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a
car
or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction
accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off
those bulldozers.)
==========================
On Marks &Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot
after heating."
(..and you thought????...)
=======================
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while
sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to
work on my hair.)
====================================
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No
purchase
necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)
===========================
On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular
soap."
(and that would be???....)
============================
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion:
Defrost."
(but, it's just a suggestion.)
========================
On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes
on body."
(but wouldn't this save me time?)
==============================
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(.I'm taking this because???....)
==============================
On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or
outdoor use only."
(as opposed to what?)
==========================
On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the
other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit
curious.)
==============================
On an American Airlines packet of nuts --
"Instructions:
Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: say what?)
===========================
On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this
garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for
this
one.)
========================
On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain
with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God..was there a lot of this happening
somewhere?)
Just got that in an email. It tickled me anyway.:D