BadAttitude
22 Aug 2004, 06:28
Hi, I am kinda back in the sense that I miss everyone and had to check in the first time in what seems like forever. Life is still very crazy for me I moved from living in the boondocks to living in Tampa, Florida three weeks ago so that I could be closer to college I am in my last year before I graduate. I changed majors last term but will still be able to graduate in May, 2005 if I take 5 classes this term and them 5 classes next term.
The week after I moved into my new apartment my mother who is 78 years old had 5 mini strokes she gets out of the hospital after a few days and then goes back into the hospital with kidney failure. The day of my 48th birthday which was August 9th, I receive a call that my mother is dying and if I want to see her one last time that I better leave or she will be dead before I get there as I am 13 hours away from her in North Carolina. I drove thirteen hours straight to get to her as I did not have the money for plane tickets after just moving. When I get there my mom looks really bad I cried my eyes out seeing her in this shape. After a few days in ICU the doctors say that she will not die, I am releived but they tell me that it is just a matter of time that she is not going to get any better and that she is in renal failure. I had to leave and go back home after staying with her a week at the hospital, she is still in the hospital she had to have a catherator to drain the urine as she can not no longer urinate on her own because of the kidney failure. My life is crazy right know one minute I tell myself that she is old and has lived her life and that when her time comes I will have to deal with it and then the next I break down crying as I don't want my mom to die. During all this my husband walked out on me twice since he has post duramatic stress symdrome and borderline personality he can not deal with stress and such it is easier for him to walk away from problems rather then to solve them. And I am trying to get ready to start five new classes in college in two days so that I can get my B.A degree in Classics Roman/Greek. Life is definetly not being kind to me as of late. If it wasn't for Meat's music and my love of my daughter and my cat little Meat Loaf I think that I would go insane.
I have missed everyone and I am so sorry to read of Vee's passing, I guess all angels must go to heaven.
I am not Christan and I pray in the ways of my people as I am Native American but I would appericate any prayers from any faith or beleif if you see fit to do so. For me that I can make it through all that is being thrown my way and for my mom.
Love
Autumn (BadAttitude)
The week after I moved into my new apartment my mother who is 78 years old had 5 mini strokes she gets out of the hospital after a few days and then goes back into the hospital with kidney failure. The day of my 48th birthday which was August 9th, I receive a call that my mother is dying and if I want to see her one last time that I better leave or she will be dead before I get there as I am 13 hours away from her in North Carolina. I drove thirteen hours straight to get to her as I did not have the money for plane tickets after just moving. When I get there my mom looks really bad I cried my eyes out seeing her in this shape. After a few days in ICU the doctors say that she will not die, I am releived but they tell me that it is just a matter of time that she is not going to get any better and that she is in renal failure. I had to leave and go back home after staying with her a week at the hospital, she is still in the hospital she had to have a catherator to drain the urine as she can not no longer urinate on her own because of the kidney failure. My life is crazy right know one minute I tell myself that she is old and has lived her life and that when her time comes I will have to deal with it and then the next I break down crying as I don't want my mom to die. During all this my husband walked out on me twice since he has post duramatic stress symdrome and borderline personality he can not deal with stress and such it is easier for him to walk away from problems rather then to solve them. And I am trying to get ready to start five new classes in college in two days so that I can get my B.A degree in Classics Roman/Greek. Life is definetly not being kind to me as of late. If it wasn't for Meat's music and my love of my daughter and my cat little Meat Loaf I think that I would go insane.
I have missed everyone and I am so sorry to read of Vee's passing, I guess all angels must go to heaven.
I am not Christan and I pray in the ways of my people as I am Native American but I would appericate any prayers from any faith or beleif if you see fit to do so. For me that I can make it through all that is being thrown my way and for my mom.
Love
Autumn (BadAttitude)