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Old 20 May 2018, 23:18   #6801
Adje
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Hatchet 1, 2, 3, Victor Crowley (2007-2017)

Pretty bad movies, but with all the elements of the great 80's slasher films. From the storyline to the (over)acting. From the setting to the old school death scenes. From the humor to the gore. It's all what makes a campy slasher movie good (or bad).

all 4 movies get the same rating from me

6,5/10
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Old 22 May 2018, 09:32   #6802
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A million ways to die in the West so very very funny
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Old 22 May 2018, 11:57   #6803
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Adje View Post
Actually changing my grade
3/10

Andrew's post made me rethink the movie and I simply realised it's pointless.

SPOILERS
Basically the involvement of the Avengers did nothing for the outcome. Not a single win (in fact if they stayed away the exact same outcome would have happened with less destruction). As Thanos said, destroy half of human kind and then he would sit back and enjoy the sunset. He did exactly that. So it's done. There even isn't a reason to fight Thansos anymore. He has achieved what he wanted. He has now relaxed and enjoy's his peace. The entire movie was just a useless story. An excuse to show of computere generated effects. Notthing more, nothing less. Emotions were non existend. Let's face it, we all know there will be some stupid reason how (some) will come back. There won't be a Guardians without Quill, no Spiderman without Spidey... and thse movies are just milkcows for Disney. As I said before, the same emotions as an average A-team episode.

I have to give it to Disney. They know how to fool the fanboys. No matter if it's SW or Marvel. It's brilliant mindclouding.
Only, Avengers 3 must have the dumbest of all stories of the entire Marvel series... as the story is basically non-existent. Many of it will be undone in Avengers 4 (I assume they are gonna turn back time) making Avengers 3 the Dallas Season that never happened because Pamela dreamed Bobby was dead.
I don't think the failure of the characters necessarily makes it a bad story or bad movie per se. Luke failed in Empire because he went into the lion's den too early. Obviously the resolution is what will make this entire story fulfilling and one doesn't have to wait too long for that.
It's the same as watching a disaster movie such as Titanic or Night to remember. You know most of the people are going to die because that is what actually happened. The shipbuilders failed and the crew mostly failed. Had they never launched the ship they all would all lived most likely. I think how a movie deals with failure is what makes it interesting to watch even on repeated viewings.

Thus I think there can be quite a bit of intrigue in failure as there was in Infinity War. They managed to fend the big purple/blue ~~~~~~ off for a long time (See Avengers 1 / Guardians 1).

I do accept that failure of main characters or even their existence or location can be a key frustration when you watch a movie such as Superman is the actual reason why Zod comes to earth. It actually makes the protagonist the reason why the antagonist can win in the first place. But I guess how this is balanced in a movie or story is what makes things watchable. I liked Superman 2 (both versions) but hate Man of Steel etc. But then for me Batman Vs Superman's beginning made up a lot. So it's interesting how even when you dislike a movie a sequel can redeem how you feel and even redeem a story to certain extent.

I think Infinity War gave the other Marvel movies quite a bit of meaning and made me want to watch some more over the weekend:

-------------------------------------------------------------

Spiderman: Homecoming. Really liked Michael Keaton's character. Wish they had explored his background a little bit more. Maybe another 5-10 minutes spent on him would have made him almost as intriguing as say the Joker or Thanos or so. Maybe show him down on his luck a bit more (broke etc). I liked the twist, but could see that coming for a bit. Didn't think it was necessary to make the twenty something actors pretend to be 15. Bit mad. Set in college rather than a school would have made more sense. Peter Parker comes across as a bit of jerk and it isn't until it looks like he loses quite late on (of course as you'd expect) he gains your sympathy. I think the reason the like-ability comes so late is that the whole uncle Ben dying is not present at all (probably told the story too often too recently). But this part was always important in the Spidey reboots to appreciate Peter's motivations to do right etc. Enjoyable but no better or worse than previous Spiderman movies I'd say. Without Keaton it would have been much worse for sure. 7/10

-------

Thor: Ragnorok.
Very funny in places, superb action, effects and good acting with even minor parts very interesting (Sam Neill / Jeff Goldblum). Cate Blanchet was an awesome sexy villain. Quite quirky in places which is what you expect with Marvel now to some extent. They obviously added the Led Zeppelin Immigrant Song in post because the repeated half note interval in the vocal line/scream is just like the Wonder Woman music. The flashbacks with how the Tessa Thompson character flew on a horse and defeated the villain in the past wanted me to see a movie about THAT too. The Hulk and Bruce Banner characters are kinda dumb and stupid in Marvel these days. Don't think it is necessary. Bruce Banner never knows what the hell is going on and the Hulk is like a gorilla with a very low IQ who doesn't even recognise his friends. Meh.
Great lead into IW however. Very satisfying movie mostly. 8/10

------

Also saw Infinity War again for my birthday yesterday. This time in normal 2D without the moving seats malarky. Probably will be my favourite of the year. Interested in seeing Captain Marvel especially and what role she will play in the resolution to the first Avengers phase. I have a feeling we will see some bizarre resolution that will explain the end of Robert Downey and other actors in Marvel but not their characters. Probably some strange reboot at the end of Infinity War part 2. Certainly intriguing I think how that will play out.
Already rated IW: 9/10. I stand by it.

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Old 22 May 2018, 17:24   #6804
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AndrewG View Post
I don't think the failure of the characters necessarily makes it a bad story or bad movie per se.
I think you missed my point. The failure part isn't the reason I think Avengers is a poor movie. The reason I find it a poor movie is because their failure is meaningless. Even the ultimate fail in these movies (death) means nothing. Peter Parker, Quill, and whoever seems important in their universe, will return from the death, because new movies have to be made. So basically there is no limit = no emotional connection.

And of course it doesn't help that it has the depth of a computergame. It lacks the heart of an action movie with all the non stop CGI stuff. What should trigger us, as a viewer is the failure part. But it doesn't because you know your main characters will return.

Basically the movie just lack effort. "We have a bunch of known superheroes. We have a computer proggie that creates any special effect you need. Voila!"

And that's part one. Then we get the sequels:
"We have a bigger bunch of known superheroes. We still have a computer proggie that creates any special effect you need. Voila!"

And then there is infinity war:
"We have almost all known superheroes. We have a computer proggie that creates any special effect you need. And for emotional value, we kill a few of them off, so people can root for their resurrection! Voila!"

Absolutely no effort.
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Old 24 May 2018, 00:27   #6805
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Quote:
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I think you missed my point. The failure part isn't the reason I think Avengers is a poor movie. The reason I find it a poor movie is because their failure is meaningless. Even the ultimate fail in these movies (death) means nothing. Peter Parker, Quill, and whoever seems important in their universe, will return from the death, because new movies have to be made. So basically there is no limit = no emotional connection.
I think the same type of argument could be made about prequel style movies such as Solo before you even see it.

You know that Han and Chewie, Lando and even the flipping Millennium Falcon are going to be just hunky-dory regardless of what happens in the film.
It makes the whole point of seeing what you know will definitely be their survival whatever is thrown at them pointless, no?

Always thought prequels generally are a bad idea. Can only think of Rogue One as being a good one. Everything else I've seen that is regarded as a prequel just sucks: The SW prequels. Star Trek retelling of the original series (albeit in a different timeline), Better Call Saul. All mostly a waste of time making in my opinion.

Probably just too many sequels and prequels of the same story line these days which destroys the whole what's a stake feeling now.
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Old 24 May 2018, 23:22   #6806
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10 Cloverfield Lane

What a cracking film! Tense and claustrophobic it really makes you live through it with the characters. Plays nicely with your belief in each of them. You root for the main heroine and believe John Goodman (in a superb performance) is mad. The twist is of course that he is mad. And dances like a demon. But not wrong. Anyway I won't spoil it but I can't really think of anything I didn't like about it.

5/5
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Old 27 May 2018, 19:31   #6807
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The Post... solid without being exceptional. Excellent performances of course but it was very linear. Not really any twists or turns so it was very predictable. Also I didn't think it really showed the consequences of the final decision. Well made but doesn't really pack a punch. 3/5

All The Presidents Men. Like the post but with twists turns and consequences. Excellent performances all round and a nice sense of tension. 4/5

The Secret Life Of Pets... fairly amusing, quite stylish, with some amusingly quirky characters. Fun enough way to pass a couple of hours. 3/5
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Old 27 May 2018, 21:02   #6808
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AndrewG View Post
I think the same type of argument could be made about prequel style movies such as Solo before you even see it.

You know that Han and Chewie, Lando and even the flipping Millennium Falcon are going to be just hunky-dory regardless of what happens in the film.
It makes the whole point of seeing what you know will definitely be their survival whatever is thrown at them pointless, no?
Haven't seen Solo yet, not really interested as I agree with your last remark. Just too many sw (what even isn't really sw) movies out there.

But no. Knowing the outcome doesn't make a movie pointless. IF they make the effort of creating/telling you something that either gives you a certain point of view to things. Or perhaps attaches you emotionally by either the storytelling or cinematography. Or anything else like that...

Avengers had nothing like that. And that is my issue with the movies. No effort whatsoever.
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Old 03 Jun 2018, 00:03   #6809
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Annihilation (2018 )

Good performance by Natalie Portman, but the movie is a bit of a mess. It seems like the director didn't really know where to go with the genre. So it's a mash-up of a bit of everything. Never convincing storyline with no real logic.

4/10
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Old 03 Jun 2018, 21:35   #6810
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Downsizing

Intriguing and Matt Damon is great as always. The Vietnamese lady he meets is superb and there's strong support from Christolph Waltz and his friend.

But I don't think the plot really makes the most of the down sized situation. It basically indicates the world will be the same but smaller. And the tone is rather uncertain too. It's humorous and quirky but not a comedy. It has a serious message about the end of days but isn't dramatic enough, or alternativly as knowingly fun and funny as 2012 or day after tomorrow.

Some beautiful scenes and a nice idea but it doesn't really land a punch. 2.5/5
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Old 03 Jun 2018, 21:59   #6811
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Deadpool 2

Riotous, hilarious, anarchic, and even slightly tedious in places, the good news is they haven't gone all world building corporate playing it safe for the follow up. You'd think it would lose the surprise factor second time around but although a little of that is lost it is made up for by the surprise involved in realising that someone had the balls to do it again!

The prison bit is a bit of a let down and is the most similar to things you've seen before.

But the landing of the x force and the baby legs more than make up for it.

Pure disposable entertainment but done for the most part very well.

3.5/5
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Old 04 Jun 2018, 15:06   #6812
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Dear Panic Lord
Any chance of falling in line with your two arch film critics on here and mark your pieces out of ten?
This would simplify and synchronise the assessments for your followers.
I was thinking of just doubling your scores in my head but the all important half mark would vanish.
Or perhaps they could drop down to the more commonly adopted five star rating?
A fear a power struggle may ensue...
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Old 04 Jun 2018, 19:42   #6813
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Quote:
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Dear Panic Lord
Any chance of falling in line with your two arch film critics on here and mark your pieces out of ten?
This would simplify and synchronise the assessments for your followers.
I was thinking of just doubling your scores in my head but the all important half mark would vanish.
Or perhaps they could drop down to the more commonly adopted five star rating?
A fear a power struggle may ensue...
Ahaha well maybe... I think they should fall in line with me. I am the Lord of Panic after all!!
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Old 05 Jun 2018, 16:30   #6814
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Dunkirk (2017)
Really thought this was sub-par. Didn't like the fragmented story telling at all. When Tarantino does it it seems awesome. Here it just seemed clumsy and take you out of what is going on the whole time. The final reveal seemed a bit emotionless to me. Could have been awesome that story told with some liberties taken to paint a patriotic picture which the movie eventually tries but completely fails.
Such an awful soundtrack. What were they thinking? Hans Zimmer is getting worse for sure. One of the worst and most nauseating soundtracks I've heard in a major movie. Bizarre.
A normal chronological edit and a proper soundtrack would have fixed most things I bet.
Only like Nolan's Dark Knight trilogy. I find the rest of what he has done very sub enjoyable for many reasons. Not that a war movie necessarily needs to be enjoyable but all this stuff has been done so much better before. I'd say even something like Fury with Brad Pitt is far, far better than this mess. Then there are classics from Spielberg and stylish visions such as Inglorious Basterds from Tarantino. This tries to be both and is just not good in the end. Neither was Interstellar. Nolan is starting to head down the worst list of directors I can mention by name but still his 3 Dark Knight movies make him more than a one hit wonder I think. The worst offenders I can think of are Steven Soderbergh and Rian Johnson.
5/10

The accountant (2016)
It's ok. Some good bits here and there. Bit daft some of it. I'd rather watch something like this type of safe movie on loop than sit through a non Dark Knight Nolan movie again.
7/10

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Old 07 Jun 2018, 23:35   #6815
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The Commuter (2018 )
*Spoilers*
Starts off ok but turns into an unnecessarily complicated mess. It's like it's 3 movies. Movie 1 feels like the film is going to something like Non Stop or Taken when you know Liam Neeson is going to be the hero of the film. You sense some unnerving event is about to unfold but you don't know what. The stage is set and this bit ain't too bad at all. But it starts to go downhill fast as soon as Neeson starts to "commute" again.
Roll on Movie 2: Some weird who dunnit on a train tries to be like a Hitchock mystery. This is where things start to get overly complicated and quite daft. I still have no precise idea what they were after, who set things up and why. You start to lose interest here because you don't really care about anyone but only Neeson a tiny bit perhaps. You certainly don't care about the people he tries to save on the train as they all come across as jerks for the most part except maybe the Jonathan Banks character.
Roll on Movie 3: The action part. With absolutely atrocious CGI (The end of Non Stop had that too btw). The "twist" you can see a mile off and the whole what happened to Liam Neeson's family is very badly done and resolved (compare to Taken).

5/10 (I am being very kind here). It's mostly for one fight scene which Neeson has where camera magic is used to cool effect in one long scene. I think after this the entire CGI crew went on a long holiday or something.
Worth a rental/Netflix maybe JUST but absolutely no more.
Very strange to add both main The Conjuring stars (Vera Farmiga and Patrick Wilson) in a non horror movie I think (why? Farmiga didn't suit the part she had here). But then all the actors/stars in this film also deserved a much better movie regardless. Honestly Sam Neill, Neesson and the Conjuring stars in a movie along with the cool guy from Breaking Bad (Jonathan Banks) and THIS is what they came up with? Hundreds of people in the credits. I don't get how it can get so bad and why you need so many crew-members to do something so poorly. I've seen more convincing CGI done by single bedroom editors/semi pro guys using the part free Hitfilm Pro software on YouTube. Mental. The movie deserves closer to a 3/10 the more I think about it. The main problem I think is that when the entire plot centres around something that happens off screen / something you hear about (some guy who apparently got murdered and a witness who needs to deliver data to the FBI for some reason?), it's just too difficult to get involved. It would be like making the Titanic movie and seeing all the first 2 hour bits but then not show the sinking and that part is only described by the modern day people. You just wouldn't give a rat's ass when you left the theatre.

A safer movie would have been to just make Neeson a commuter who stops a terrorist on a train journey. That is the movie which I thought this was going to be. Not some overly complicated mess of different ideas based on a death/murder that happened off screen. 30 million bucks?! Mental.

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Old 08 Jun 2018, 07:24   #6816
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Spiderman 2

Still by far and away the best of the Spiderman films for me. Funny, quirky, full of emotion, full of energy, great villain, J K Simmons is hilarious, and wow that train stopping scene.

4.5/5

Or

9/10
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Old 08 Jun 2018, 21:46   #6817
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Ghostbusters Answer The Call

Utterly abysmal. Cringe inducingly unfunny. Hugely patronising toward woman. But somehow you watch to the end, incredulous that any of the original stars, Chris Hemsworth, or any picture studio had anything to do with it. I think my first ever

0/5

Or

0/10
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Old 09 Jun 2018, 20:24   #6818
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Jurassic Park

The original and best. Intriguing premise, kids that only irritate you a bit before they start to earn your sympathy, some great actors, and some amazing dinosaur thrills and action. For the first time in screen I was convinced dinosaurs were real. Almost all of the effects still hold up 25 years later.

10/10
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Old 10 Jun 2018, 08:05   #6819
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Jurassic Park Lost World

Ok so it doesn't have the intrigue or surprise factor of the first one. The ending once it transfers to San Diego is also ridiculous. Why didn't they just crash the ship into the arena killing the last remaining dinosaurs, destroying the arena, and ruining InGen once and for all?

However. It still has Steven Spielberg on top form behind the camera and Jeff Goldblum in front of it. There are some amazing sequences, like the TRex/van/cliff bit and the raptor attack in the long grass. Pete Postlethwaite is great as the lead hunter.

The plot does tend to rely on extremely intelligent people doing really stupid things.

But I'm still entertained. The pluses outweigh the minuses for me.

8/10
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Old 10 Jun 2018, 08:11   #6820
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Jurassic Park 3

Mm. Here's where the well of inspiration starts to run dry. The way people are got back on the island with the illicit tourist operation going wrong is quite plausible. But then the script seems to think it's a family comedy including weak humour at the expense of scares. The dinosaurs for the first time are largely irrelevant. They could have been any type of dangerous animal.

Sam Neil is of course excellent and the pterodactyls are very good and that sequence works surprisingly well.

But I really wish they killed off Tea Leoni near the start or at least told her to stop shrieking.

You can tell the film makers are running out of ideas. If nothing else the film is about half an hour shorter than the others. This is often a good thing but in this case I thin they couldn't think of anything else top include.

Somewhat entertaining but far from a classic and not a patch on the previous 2.

5/10
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Old 10 Jun 2018, 20:59   #6821
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The Shape of Water (2017)

Visually stunning, great acting, beautiful little love story. Just a tat long.

7/10
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Old 10 Jun 2018, 22:18   #6822
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Jurassic World

Well this is odd. Having now watched the film 3 times, and this time straight after JP3, I enjoyed the film much more than before. It is certainly leagues ahead of 3 but still behind 2. I think the problem when I first saw it was how disappointing and unambitious it was versus my expectations. I've explained what I don't like about it before so I won't repeat all that now.

But the things I do like... bringing back Rexy. Some of the humour. The new Richard Hammond sorry can't remember his name. The new dinosaur and the emotion at the random killing. The mososaur.

Anyway I found that if I turned my brain off and tried not to groan out loud at some of the stupidity (which to be fair you have to do with JP2 JP3 and most blockbuster movies) I found it was actually a very entertaining popcorn thrill ride.

7/10. Could have been so much more but delivers what it sets out to in fine style as long as you don't think about it too much. I wonder what Christopher Nolan would do with a JP film?
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Old 11 Jun 2018, 10:03   #6823
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Justice League.

*Spoilers*
Not good enough and in my opinion a big step back from Batman vs Superman after a truly dismal Man of Steel. You remember teleporting Lois Lane? Well she is back again and her teleporting powers are stronger than ever, though she did have some help from Alfred. Grumpy Superman is back. He never seems to charm or uplift the movie even a tiny percentage that Christopher Reeve always did.

Boring stupid villain. Nothing like the decent and quite good ones they have in Marvel now.

Has some ok action bits but I absolutely hated the way Superman was resurrected. So imbecilic piss poor. Probably the worst idea in the movie. I don't get the point of the final scene in Batman vs Superman when you see what happens here.

Poor character motivation and clearly tries to be all Marvel-esque but isn't good enough to share that stage.

Flash is a stupid moron who they treat as comic relief. Awful in execution mostly.

Interesting that the Superman theme somewhat resurfaced in the soundtrack. But very different music here from the previous Zimmer soundtracks. Themes probably suit Superman better but it all comes too late regardless.

5/10

Worth a watch if you are a huge super hero fan but I can understand why Justice League 2 probably won't be made now.
My guess is they will probably reboot Batman and Superman AGAIN.... *sigh*

If your main actor can't shave off his moustache because of "contract obligations" maybe you should 1) delay the movie or 2) hire a different actor. Option 3) "just" cgi his mouth clearly shows how incompetent these movie makers are.
There was no reason to get Justice League made so quickly other than trying to be just like Marvel from an arrogance stand point. I think another Superman movie in between (with a better resurrection story) and perhaps a Ben Affleck standalone Batman film first would have helped things a bit.
Gal Gadot's Wonder Woman probably will be the only incarnation that will survive for another several DC movies I reckon. Aquaman perhaps has potential. We will see. Cyborg was useless. The Flash was annoying.

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Old 13 Jun 2018, 16:16   #6824
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Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018 )

Great thrill ride. When the dinos are NOT in groups on screen the CGI is astonishingly perfect and very convincing. 4DX is relentless on this one.
Nothing deep story wise but a decent continuation of JW 1. If you didn't like that, don't bother with this as it's no better. They show too many key scenes in the trailer too. Some dumb bits in the first half hour but it definitely picked up I think and I just wanted to see where they were going with it all and had me very intrigued.
I enjoyed it and really appreciated the nods to JP1.

Now bring back Sam Neill in JW3 and we can lay the franchise to bed for a bit.
7/10
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Old 13 Jun 2018, 18:38   #6825
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Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom (2018 )

Let's start by the best thing they could come up with to start this sequel...

They created the freaking multimillion park on an Island with an active volcano!? So all the research all the money that went into building this park for the future, and they overlooked this minor detail... In other words, you realise the quality of writing into this and just hope for the best...

And to be fair, the first 30 minutes or so were kind of promissing (although already very predicatable). And then... everything collapsed like a house of cards. Same annoying, non-developed characters. Same 'if we do it bigger it must be better' mentallity that failed the first JW movie and the dumbest, incredible stupid, plot/story of all of the Jurassic movies. CGI is quite good at times but also pretty underwhelming several times. So even there it didn't do an outstanding job.

Where Colin T. destroyed JW with his bad directing, they did the same in this movie by bad writing. Again they managed to destroy the tention before it can actually develop into tension. It is poorly and predictable written. From the guy on the ladder in the opening to the underwater scene with Claire and the tech guy (who's name I forgot),you know what's coming and it never draws you into the movie.

I wonder if anybody actually smiled (let alone laugh) about the tech-guy's 'jokes'. It's an insult that these movies are now part of the legacy of Steven Spielberg's Jurassic Park.

It has been a while since I saw JP 3. I remember it to be bad. JW was by far the worst big budget movie of 2015, but I might find this one even more terrible than those two movies.

I agree with Andrew. If you didn't like JW, avoid this one like the plague. But even if you enjoyed that one, you have to be able to shut down your expectations, common sense and basically stop your brain for anything logic. Yes, I know, it's fantasy, not a realistic movie whatsoever, but at least make sure your writing make sense. JWFK is a mess when it comes to these things.

All of a sudden "Let's go watch 'Solo'!" doesn't sound that bad after all.

3,5/10
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